Where have I been?
Right here! I've never left, I've just been less active. I haven't participated in social media nearly as much or even written comments on some of my favourite blogs. If you emailed me, I still responded like usual. But I'm not up for communication at the moment. I haven't for a long time.
I'm not tired of all the lovely people on and off the internet. In fact, I miss them a lot. I just haven't felt up to writing. I haven't even been texting with my best friends as often. Even to type is tiring and all I want to do is lie down and stare at the screen. But this isn't even bringing my energy back. I force myself to take a long walk at least once a week (but usually more) but it hasn't helped (nor made it worse so I continue to get out for a minute). I really enjoy being out too, I wander through stores and bring home coffee for my mum and I. But afterward, I need to relax and I end up lying down for the rest of the day and sometimes go to bed early. I always mean to write but I'm just so tired and any energy I do have for writing goes to school work.
Being chronically ill is so much more isolating than people would imagine. Not only do you feel so different from other people who seem to have no end to their energy, sometimes you're just too tired to communicate with the people who get it. Though electronics do make it easier, it can still be a struggle. Pain and fatigue can affect your mind and thinking clearly some days can be hard, forget writing. The physical process of typing can be a lot to handle.
So, please forgive my absence. I just don't feel good right now. I don't know when I'll feel better, either. It's so hard to tell what's going on right now: Arthritis is kicking my butt, my kidneys are kicking my butt and even my GI system is kicking my butt at the moment.