Confessions of a teenager with arthritis.
1. I am embarrassed. Embarrassed of my knees, my weakness, stiffness, pain, and most especially my limp. I don't want to bring attention to my legs or be the only person walking in the corridor, and I truly hate that my face gives away pain.
2. I know people think I'm faking, and why wouldn't they? I'm a seemingly healthy, young lady and I must obviously be looking for attention. Even doctors are suspicious and every time there is a fluctuation in my weight, I know they instantly suspect eating disorders. It couldn't possibly be the new medicines.
3. It's hard to relate to kids my own age about a lot of things: you don't realise it, but chronic illness changes a lot in your life. I talked about this in my post 'Arthritis Normal.' A lot of kids my age think its odd that I take my time getting where I need to and that I don't enjoy parties, as well as other things.
4. As much as I would like to be in remission and not have to go to the hospital, I don't really mind it much anymore. I know a lot of people at the hospital and genuinely enjoy talking to them and I have gotten to know them well through the years, and they know me very well.
5. I've gained more through having this painful disease than I ever would have without it: I have beautiful friendships and have gained a lot of wisdom and compassion through it.
Perhaps these dont go for all teenagers, but they do for me.