When you're tired, everything is painful. Joints are painful. Moving is painful. Colours, cold, light, and sound hurts too. Currently I'm curled up with a blanket because it's not nearly as painful as sitting up. Today is not a good day.
It's odd how one day your on top of the world, and then the next day you don't think you can open your eyes, forget open the door and go out in the world. But you go out anyway, because you know you have to push on. And while you carry on, the world seems to want your attention more than ever. Things pop up from nowhere and need to be completed. People need you to be here and there and everywhere. And worse, pain demands to be felt.
There are times I forget that despite youth promising energy, I still have arthritis and I am going to have days where I feel horrible. It's not so hard to push on than to accept reality. I'm a young kid. I want to go out and do things with my life. It's disappointing to have 'an old person's disease' hold you down sometimes. And it probably will for a long time.
While it would be nice to just give up and let the disease take over, I won't let it. I've come so far in such a short life time to just do that. If I was supposed to let the disease take over, it would've taken me down by now. But it hasn't. I'm superior to it. Just as working hard to get good grades is worth it, pushing past my arthritis is worth it. Life isn't going to wait for me, after all.